your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
