what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize