if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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