We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
