There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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