my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
