one two three fourrrrnication!
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
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