I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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