My hand turned me down
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
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