i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
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