oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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