How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
