OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Randomize
