Small penises have feelings too.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
