Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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