Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
