I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
