did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
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