your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.