So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
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