fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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