We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Randomize
