So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Randomize
