If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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