I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize