so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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