Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
