i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
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