i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Randomize
