why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
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I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
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and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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