it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
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