I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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