Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize