What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
