at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
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