I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize