ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
