We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
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