I bet he comes in French.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
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