i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
