i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
