I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
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