Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
