Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
No stitches, just platelets and will power
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
