ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
