Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
i believe in u and ur pee
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
