Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
