Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
