Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
