batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
