Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
